Living in Italy





It's been 5 years since I came to Italy as a PhD student. I talked about all the bureaucratic requirements of living in Italy as a student and all the paperwork that needs to be completed in my previous post. In this post, I will mention how living in Italy for 5 years changed my life, how Italians live differently or what to expect from living in Italy as a foreigner.





Life : There are certain points in daily life in Italy that somehow work different than Turkey. Since I cannot categorize them under anything, I will just mention them here as a list:

 -  Passeggiata: Back in Turkey when we decide to meet up with friends, we used to go out for a coffee shop in the afternoon or to a restaurant and a bar in the evening. If we decided to meet in the evening, it would mean that the dinner is definitely included to the plan and the rest is optional: you can spend 5 hours dining, you can go to a pub for more drinks, you can switch to dancing or simply for a nargile cafe. But it is definite that you will be sitting down around a table for deep or funny conversations. When it comes to Italy, when people meet in the evening, you have to decide whether you meet for dinner. If for dinner, the meeting time is around 8-9, if not around 11. When you meet around 11, you simply meet up in the biggest square in town and take a passeggiata, which is like walking around the down as you have a drink, a small talk and catch up with friends. The good part is that you are constantly moving, so even if you don't like the company, it is highly possible that you will come across with others. The bad part is that it is possible your friend comes across with another friend and you are supposed to wait for them to finish their talk even for half an hour!

 -   Punctuality: There are many things that Italians are amazing but being on time is not one of them. Back in Turkey when someone says "hey, come over my place for dinner at 8" it kinda means "be there at 8, I'll prepare the food and we can start dining when everyone comes together." While in Italy it means "hey, don't mind me saying at 8. Start coming around 8.30 so we can all start cooking at 9 while having some appetizers in the meantime." It is a fact that Italians from the south tend to be more relaxed and more "late" compared to the people from the north but this is not always the case and they will be late 90%. Obviously for formal occasions, I wouldn't encourage you to be late, but being "fashionably late" time to time isn't such a bad idea.

 -   Opening hours: Turkey is not the most modern country, but I feel like one of the best one when it comes to the service sector. No matter what time it is, you can always find an open market in your neighborhood to buy some snacks or you know that during the day, even the smallest local shop (a shoe repairer, a restaurant, a tailor, anything) will be open for business. When it comes to Italy, business has no value compared to the leisure time of workers. All public offices, banks or shops are mostly closed for lunch times, except big supermarkets, little mini markets or restaurants. Similarly, not all the restaurants and bars are open all day: they are mostly open for lunch, close during the afternoon and open again for dinner. So, in order to organize your day, to run some errands or to complete some paperwork, you always have to check he working hours in advance.
-   Food delivery: In Turkey, we are used to ordering anything to home online or over the phone. We don't use tap water, but there are water distributors to deliver a 20 liter of water bottle right at your door in half an hour notice. There are applications (especially in big cities) that you can have your shopping list delivered at your door within half an hour from any supermarket you want and it works 24 hours a day! Plus, you can have any type of food delivered to your home and mostly for free if they cannot deliver the order within half an hour. Well, in Italy, these are all dreams. It is true that some big supermarkets provide an online delivery - but you have to organize your delivery 2 weeks in advance. Water delivery doesn't exist at all, so you need to hit the supermarket every time you are out of water - or even before because obviously supermarkets do not work after 8PM or on Sundays. Luckily, they started the food delivery from alternative websites, such justeat.it or lappetit.it but keep in mind that also those restaurants work only after a certain time and do not work all the days. (for instance our favorite pizzeria with home delivery doesn't work on Mondays and they deliver really late on Fridays or Saturdays so we prefer avoiding those days)

 -   Renaissance culture and art: OK, this amazes me every single time. Italy has such deep ties with art and culture, the modern life, especially in smaller towns have incredible surprises at every corner. For instance, the H&M in my town (Pisa) is in one of the ancient palaces so the time passes by sooo fast when you have to wait in a cue to pay since you can spare this time enjoying an amazing mural art. Alternatively, in Puglia, the old castles are owned by comune, so they either organize art exhibitions that are open to public for free occasionally or you can book one of those historical places by the sea to actually get married in it (this is actually what we did: booking a boring room in comune had a cost about 200€ while booking the castle had 300€, we made the wiser choice!).

 -   Living costs: Accomodation is not very cheap in Italy, especially in new, modern buildings. As a PhD student I used to receive 1250€ per month and the rent of my 1 bedroom apartment was about 700€ per month without the bills. So, obviously renting a house alone might be not the case but I believe it is the same everywhere. On the other hand, market shopping can be really cheap, since healthy living and food are extremely crucial in Italy, even the cheapest products you buy taste amazing. So you can survive a month for about 100 - 150€ per month eating fresh vegetables and meat in a balanced diet. I also would like to mention dining out: in Turkey, there is a huge gap between the restaurants in terms of quality and the price. Obviously, in big Italian cities a similar gap might exist but in an average Italian city, an average full course meal (appetizers, first dish, second dish, wine and water) would cost about 30 - 50€ depending your choices. Obviously, you can find a cheaper "tourist menu" but I will mention later why you will prefer avoiding these places later. You can find restaurants that would cost less or more. But the chances that you might be dining out with your boss or with the mayor of the city are quite high because the prices in restaurants are pretty standard and in Italy, everybody has the right to dine well. That can be even the only reason to live in Italy forever!

 -   La Dolce Vita: This is a super famous Italian life-style motto symbolizing "the beauty of not doing anything!" Imagine yourself sitting on a big Tuscan square, sipping your wine, having a bite from your tagliere as the sun goes down. Or imagine yourself in Puglia during a summer night, sitting on a wall, feeling the wind from the sea over your skin and having a delicious gelato in your hand. Just enjoying these little things, having small talk with your friends or husband and watch people passing by. Those little things are the ones that make you happy in the end of the day and Italy is an amazing place to learn this secret.

 -   Open markets: Italian cities are amazing with little squares, but also amazing flea markets that are set periodically. For each city, there are certain timings for these markets to be opened and you can find amazing secret gems for your home or as accessories. Despite of all the amazing ways Italians live their lives or organize open flea markets periodically, I am completely disappointed by the lack of gorgeous Christmas markets. Sure, they always decorate trees and lights around and sure, you can mostly find little stands where you can buy Christmas decorations but you will never find the festive soul similar to Germany, Hungary or Czech Republic. I observed a similar trend in Spain and I think it is because the people in the north Europe are not used to partying outside and for them Christmas markets become an amazing excuse, while for Italians is an everyday habit so they don't make a big deal out of it. 



Food: In Italy, the food is no joke, no opinion or not open for experimentations. Italians take cooking and eating religiously serious and they say something like "you just killed an Italian grandma by eating that" when encountered with non-traditional food. Don't get me wrong, they are also open for other cultures, like Japanese or Middle East restaurants are always full with regular customers but they are super sensitive when it comes to Italian food and how it is served.

 -   Olive oil: The bottom line of Italian food is mostly the good olive oil. Every time we have a trip to Turkey for a week or two, my husband travels with a bottle of olive oil because he simply (physically) cannot stand any other type of oil but the olive oil. I heard an Italian colleague preparing a single luggage only for the olive oil, pasta and tomato sauce right before he left for a 3 months period in Germany. Once, I listened to my colleagues talking about olive oil for 1 hour with the subtitles as how it is done, how it is done differently in every region in Italy, how the technology developed over time and which region makes better olive oil with the cheaper price - like, seriously!

 -   Chicken and carbs: There are certain sins in cooking that might sound like nonsense for foreigners. For instance, having a spaghetti with sour cream? NO! Pasta with chicken? OF COURSE NO! Pizza with chicken? HAVE YOU LOST YOUR MIND? NO! Spaghetti with meatballs? SEPARATELY, YES; TOGETHER, HELL NO! Once, we were in a little Italian pizzeria in London with all tables full with Italian customers (including me) and an American lady. The menu was simple, not more 10 types of pizza and some desserts. The American lady looked at the menu for a while sipping up her wine (another sin, no wine with pizza! You can have a beer or water - that's it!) and asked the waitress if they have a pizza with chicken topping. The second she said "chicken" in a pizzeria, I swear, all the customers turned to the lady and said "noooo no no you cannot do that! pizza with chicken doesn't exist and shouldn't exist!". The lady was stunned during a 10 seconds of silence (that should be a record or something because Italians really do not go along with silence) and she had to say "sorry didn't know" and kept taking suggestions from the waitress. We also keep having discussions with my husband because every time I ask "why we shouldn't cook pasta with chicken" he answers "god no, you shouldn't even ask this question!" I still don't know why. But, with this sensitivity in mind, do not try to go experimental with Italian cuisine or ask for modifications when you eat outside, obviously unless you have an allergy or a strict limitation.

 -   Moderation: It is true that Italians love eating but they know that the secret is "moderation". Somehow the Italian food tastes amazing because all the tastes are combined in a moderate way such that none of them leads the overall dish. In a full course meal, they can eat a lot of dishes but all the dishes come in small portions so there is room for everything (well, except the celebrations, I will come to that later). Their meal mostly includes a little bit of everything, prepared at home with fresh ingredients rather than frozen products. The dressings are mostly olive oil with herbs (basilico, mint, pepper, garlic, etc.) rather than ketchup and mayonnaise. Obviously, also pizza or focaccia every now and then, but once or twice a week. Italians are not very crazy about gym but everyone takes care of what they eat and almost everybody works out - in a moderate amount obviously. Another tip about pizza: except during a trip in Napoli, Italians do not eat pizza during lunch: it's mostly for dinner. If you don't want to look like a tourist, order your meal accordingly.

 -   Regions of food: Did you know that Italy used to have countless city states? Maybe yes. Did you know that each of these cities used to have their traditional food and they still do? Maybe no. Well, now you do. You cannot expect to find the same quality of certain food in all around Italy. So, you have to search the traditional dish in the region you are and taste it for the best experience. For the best pizza, you should be in Napoli, best pasta al pesto in Genova, best Mozarella di bufala in Puglia, best prosciutto in Parma or best arancini in Sicily.

 -   Coffee: Italians take coffee seriously, but strictly. For Italians, coffee means espresso. If you go to a bar and ask for a coffee in general, this is what you get. You cannot ask for additional milk on espresso, you can simply order caffe macchiato for espresso with some warm milk or cappuccino for espresso with milk foam. Even though some regions live by the rule of "no cappuccino after lunch time" I've also seen many Italians doing it, so it's not that crucial. Yet, keep in mind that the milk foam in Italy is somehow much more dense than they do in other countries, so I might suggest to opt for a caffe macchiato. For longer options, you can order americano for espresso with boiling water or caffe macchiatone for a bigger macchiato option. 

Language: Italians are mostly friendly and sometimes even flirty. However, very few Italians are really fluent and only few Italians can manage basic conversations in English. Obviously, Italy is a super touristic country so you can always find a touristic place in which you can order your food in English or manage your basic needs in English but other than that, it is challenging to find English speakers around you. Learning at least the basic level of Italian is highly recommended if you have any intention of moving to Italy even before your departure. Keep in mind that even speaking Italian is not enough: once the guy in tabaccheria insisted not to understand me for almost 10 minutes because I kept saying "abonmento" instead of "abonamento". You should stay positive and continue learning. 


Travel: With respect to Turkey, Italian climate isn't that different and is one of the best in Europe. You can simply enjoy all seasons and find all types of nature. During winter, you can go up in the north for skiing while you can find the best beaches of Europe in the south. You can keep moving within Italy easily thanks to fast train connections and low-cost Ryanair. Similarly; with Ryanair, wizz air or easyjet, you can find yourself in another city in Europe for a weekend trip! Having occasional vacations here and there will be really helpful. Keep in mind that despite of their lack of foreign language skills, Italian people love traveling - so try to organize your trip in advance for a budget trip especially around New years eve, easter or halloween vacations. 




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